Most Americans Don't Respect Single Moms
If you’re a single mom, you probably face a lot of obstacles in your daily life.
Money, childcare, stress, and anxiety are all hard things to manage when you’re shouldering the burden alone.
But new research suggests that economic worries and time management aren’t the biggest concerns for today’s mom-led households. Instead, the average American attitude may be your leading adversary.
Don’t believe it? Read on.
Most Americans have a lack of respect for single moms
eLearners.com (http://www.elearners.com), a web resource of EducationDynamics, which connects prospective students with online degrees, recently surveyed a random sampling of Americans (click for full details), and found that 56% of respondents don’t think single moms are respectable. To be clear: only 44% of those surveyed would classify single moms as “respectable.” This is roughly the same number of Americans that supports clemency for convicted murderers.
A full 27% of respondents believed that single moms should accept lower-paying jobs, in exchange for more time at home with their children. If that’s not immediately appalling, consider the fact that even back in 1950, 40% of women (between ages 25 and 54) worked outside the home. And that was 60 years ago!
Besides creating professional and financial dead ends for single mom families, low quality jobs are less stable – adding unemployment anxiety to an already difficult situation.
Even more alarming? Nearly 66% of those surveyed were against the idea that single moms should receive any special assistance – including financial aid for college or tax breaks. Compare that number to 70% of Americans who reported, in a similar-sized survey, that they support educational opportunities for prison inmates.
Evidently, the American public is more concerned with helping convicts climb the social ladder than law-abiding women, who happen to be single.
Unfortunately, public opinion does impact public policies
If these opinions were isolated, they’d be disappointing. Taken together, they’re downright dangerous. Unpopular ideas are unlikely to gain government support, which is usually a benefit of living in an enlightened democracy. But when it comes to single moms, Americans are proving to be far from enlightened.
According to the National Opinion Research Center, the majority of Americans support government spending that protects the environment, deals with drug addiction – even spending that beautifies U.S. parks. But very few people believe that public funds should be allocated for increased loans and scholarships that are dedicated to single moms. In short, Americans’ bad attitude towards single moms is more than just offensive. It’s creating a stigma that denies women adequate education support.
A college education is life-changing, and maybe life-saving
If you think that too much is being made of these statistics, then you haven’t been watching the news lately. Simply put: college offers a life-changing advantage. It remains undisputed that college degree holders earn many thousands more, per year, than non-college grads. Over the course of a career, the difference may add up to one million dollars or more. College degree holders are more likely to hold onto their jobs during tough economic times, and are qualified for far more positions if they do wind up job-hunting.
More importantly, recent studies indicate that college degree holders are healthier – thanks to a combination of factors, including more money for a better diet, increased access to health insurance, and decreased stress levels often associated with financial strain. Cancer patients with a college degree are less likely to die from their condition. College grads are also less likely to smoke, and more likely to exercise.
Why you should care
There are more than 10 million single moms in this country, all raising children under the age of 18. Regardless of their circumstances – widowed, divorced, or never married – these women are responsible for a huge percentage of our future citizens.
Custodial single moms are more than twice as likely to raise their kids in poverty as custodial single dads. And even if they are living above the poverty line, the majority of single moms lack an education beyond the high school level. The statistics are alarming, because poverty and lack of maternal education both have a proven, negative impact on kids’ academic achievement and social behavior.
Ways you can help to create change
Private companies and organizations are helping to fill the gaps that some Americans would rather ignore. Paving the way is eLearners.com, a leader in online education resources. For the past 3 years, eLearners.com has sponsored the Project Working Mom scholarship program, which is designed to help America’s moms earn the college degrees that they need to excel.
You can help raise awareness about the lack of opportunities for single moms by writing to your local representative, and by becoming our friend on Facebook. You can also help by:
- Taking our poll "Do Single Moms Get a Bad Rap?"
- Signing the Project Working Mom petition.
- Sharing on Facebook with your friends and family.
- Tweeting about this to your followers.
- Leaving a comment below about where you stand on this issue.
References:
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Comments for Most Americans Don't Respect Single Moms:
43 comment(s)
Heather M. On Thursday, February 18 2010
Boo hiss on haters - why kick someone when they're already down?
sarah On Friday, February 19 2010
This really upsets me. it's not right!
Erin On Monday, February 22 2010
Wow. Just wow.
mitchell j On Wednesday, February 24 2010
iam a single father and i agree. single mothers and fathers really are looked down upon.and its really not right..hell its not like they know the sitsuation.everybodys case is different.
Fallon Havens On Monday, March 01 2010
Its terrible that prison inmates are more important than single parents to some people.
Jay Cee On Wednesday, March 03 2010
They don't know what we've been through so they shouldn't judge.
KH On Thursday, March 04 2010
It's sad that so many people look down on single moms and dads. The very people who make these negative comments wouldn't be here to comment if it weren't for their mother and their father.
MR On Friday, March 05 2010
We all need to take a stand and be smarter than those people making such ignorant comments. We need to help spread the word and help educate those people that have never been in these kinds of situations. I am a single mother and do not consider myself a victim. I think it is only fair to have options for scholarships or our children might not have have an interest in college if we (parents) never got a chance to go to college.
TJ On Saturday, March 13 2010
Who are these people to judge? A single parent should not be looked down upon just because they do not have a spouse. Do not place judgement if you do not know the situation.
Jill Short On Sunday, March 28 2010
What America needs to understand is that there are many single mom's that are not in this situation by choice. Their husbands have left due to adultry or maybe their husband's have passed away. One major issue is that the banks and the government should not hold single mom's accountable for their X husband's bad financial choices. I am fortunate to have a College education and a career that I love. I would hope that the Government would allow for Tax credits for Childcare and for college loans while a single mom is trying to better her life and the life of her kids.
Kristen Jensen On Wednesday, April 07 2010
I just found your site and find it all very inspiring. I think that for most single mothers and for me, there is a sense from the outside world that we (I) did something wrong to be in the situation of single motherhood. There are many of us that did not consiously decide to bring up our children alone. Thank you for your site and amazing support.
Susan J*** On Friday, April 09 2010
I wonder if the stigma could be labeled as another discrimination? Coworkers have had better treatment. It's hard enough being a single parent and attempt to create a normal life for you/children. I have found it to be impossible. Being single in the truest form. You are NOT a single parent if you are living with: boyfriend, family, friends there is a difference! Or if any/all are close by. No offense to anyone just when your little kids get sick on workdays and daycare won't take'em. Life gets so VERY REAL!!
Vidya P On Thursday, April 15 2010
Being a single parent is not always our choice.People need to realize that.
Dawn On Tuesday, April 27 2010
I am a single mom with two wonderful boys at home (they are 17 and 11). My boys have more respect for me and other adults then most of the teenagers I see today. They know I have to work hard to give them what they want and need in life, they know what a dollar is worth and they take care of their things. Most kids don't learn this lesson until later in life because their parents hand them what they want.
My boys also participate in football, wrestling, track, cub scouts, swimming and we do a lot of things together. I may be luckier then some single parents because I have my entire family behind me when it comes to dividing my time (some events happen on the same time and day). My family is more then willing to fill in where I can't be and the boys understand this.
I don't think everyone can be a single parent, but I enjoy it and I wouldn't change the relationship I have with my sons for the world.
deb On Monday, May 03 2010
When I was a child, I swore that I would never become a single parent. Fast forward 12 years into a bad marriage and I made a tough choice to divorce my husband so that my sons and I could live and thrive. We are HAPPY!!! We have peace, joy and most of all love. I just graduated with a Masters degree and will soon begin my Doctoral program. I never would have accomplished these things with my ex-husband. Kudos to single parents who raise their children to know God, love and resect themselves/others and aim for the stars!!!
ann_2175 On Wednesday, May 12 2010
wow! I admit I am a single mom and I did not make very wise decisions, but will never regret my children. I was afraid to leave my children's father because I worried about what people would say. I was miserable and my children were miserable. I finally broke away and started my life over. My children are happy and I am happy. They know that most everything I do it is for them. It has been three years. I tell you what from the 4 year old to the 11 year old, whenever people meet them I am complemented on how well they behave and how sweet they are, in school, at the park, in church-it doesn't matter where. They inspire me and because of them I aim for more out of life. Because I want them to know that they can be anything and do anything..so I am going back to school...It is hard for me but if I get discouraged all I have to do is look at my 3 kids face and see their smiles to be motivated again. I am mad at myself sometimes when I think of the wasted years I spent in a verbally and emotionally abusive relationship worried about what people would think and keeping myself and my kids miserable and depressed. I no longer worry about what "people"think or what people will say. These people have no direct influence on my life, only the people who love me and I love unconditionally matter to me.For everyone else...kick rocks. The one thing I have learned in my years is that no one is perfect. Yes I am a single mother and was not married when I had them..my children are proof of my "no longer closeted skeletons".But those same people who see single mothers as not respectable have skeletons as well. the only difference is that-they just hide them better!
BR On Wednesday, May 12 2010
I wouldn't call a widowed or divorced mom or dad a "single parent," and if I were a widowed or divorced parent, I wouldn't self-identify as a single parent. Single parenthood is viewed as non-traditional, and yes, there is a stigma. Often the stigma is worse on the kids than on the parent. Education is the answer!
Drea On Sunday, May 30 2010
I am a single mother of two children (ages 7 & 10) and have been for a little over four years now. Even though I do have my mother to help me with them while I work and my boyfriend (of 2 1/2 yrs) lives with me...I ultimately am their parent and all of the responsibility falls on me. My boyfriend is not their father, nor does he have to be shouldered with any more responsibility than he chooses. I control their medical decisions, I miss work when they are too sick for my mom to watch, and I decide what they can and cannot have, and this is the hardest job I have ever had, but also one of my greatest accomplishments. I have an A.A. degree which I attained while with their father (my now ex-husband) but have struggled for the past four years to extend my education farther and have acquired thousands of dollars in loans to even get my foot slightly in the door because this is now my second attempt at my bachelor degree because of the hardships I have had to endure being a single parent. I am judged even harsher now than I was before my boyfriend joined my life because he is not their father. My boss has no children so she is always an obstacle in my way when it comes to my children and the demanding needs of raising them.
I am a firm believer that single PARENTS need to be respected and admired for their strength and courage to take on such an enormous responsibility, BUT, there are always going to be those single parents out there who are the reason honest, hardworking, parents attain such a bad rap. Believe me when I say, the ones who sit on their butt and mooch off the state because they make more money in child support and welfare without having to lift a finger to earn it. It took me three years of struggling to find a decent job to finally get off of foodstamps and that was a day of celebration for me!
Deann On Tuesday, June 01 2010
I am a single mother. I feel that other should have the respect to understand that sometimes thing happen and people driven to different directions. I have one son and raising three other children (sister past away). When we are shopping or out doing things together people always ask, "are all of these children yours.” The most horrible thing is that people bias due to the work “single.” We are still parents, mother, friend, daughter/brothers, and employees. This should not stop them from having the respect that is give to two parent households. I feel we should rethink respect. Yes, my mother stays in the same city. Nevertheless, she works and cannot give me all the assistance that I need daily. I am so shock that people think this way.
monroe On Monday, June 07 2010
listen up people! this article is about single MOMS. i, as a single parent, sympathize with any single parent. it's a hard job. but i don't think you can really compare single moms and single dads, as far as how our patriarchal society treats each. people think it's so admirable when a single father is doing what he should be doing, and raising his child. he's a saint in the eyes of many, b/c single fathers are rare. single moms are more common, b/c so many males DON'T take responsibility for their children. it's a whole different thing, so while staying sympathetic to single fathers. lets stay on the subject of the article, which is how americans view single MOMS.
Siriphan Sandy On Wednesday, June 09 2010
i am a single mon with my son he is too young only 1 year, in Thailand we have differentiated cultures, strong in social relationship and no chance for single mom like me, i ever love one guy but we separated now cause his mon don't like that and he can' accept me anymore and in my social most people ignore about single mon.
but i believe single mon can do everything same as others, and more matured than others.
EM On Saturday, July 31 2010
Wow! The comments are pretty encouraging and positive. The Single Parent Alliance and Resource Center (SPARC) is proud to work on behalf of single parents. For more information, call 678-253-0162 or visit www.singleparent411.org.
anonymous On Saturday, August 14 2010
I am a single mom. Last fall I needed my son to live with his dad while I got my business to it's next phase of growth so that i could better support us. I asked a friend of 40 years who is also a family law attorney if I should be concerned about anything. I was never married to father nor did we have any type of court order regarding custody. I live in WA he in CA. The arrangement was suppose to be temporary, only for the remainder of school year.
The family law attorney friend did not think it was important to tell me about the UCCJEA. She told me she thought I was making a good decision and that since we have gotten along there should not be a problem. I took her word for it and proceeded to work around the clock to ensure my business success.
When it came time for my son to come home I was served with a court order granting temporary custody to my sons father. I was very angry at lawyer friend who did not see fit to inform me that if I allowed my son to remain in CA for 6 months or more there was a possibility of loosing custody.
When I conveyed my to my friend my anger and hurt I was informed to never contact her again, that I did not put her on retainer and that she was not responsible.
This same lawyer went through a divorce and was a single mom in the late 70's. My parents offered her emotional support and kindness when her church ex-communicated her.
This same attorney took 3 personal phone calls while in a consultation with yet another single mother who had paid her fee and was looking for advise and guidance. When she showed up for second appointment with this attorney, the attorney was on an extended phone call with her daughter. Needless to say the single mom in need of help and support picked up her check off the desk and left the appointment.
Single mom do not even get respect from those who have been single mom's themselves. It is truly heartbreaking.
I have no idea where my son will be living come fall. He is acting out disrespectful and defiant. Can't say I blame him...I feel like I let him down.
Miss Joy On Thursday, August 19 2010
Its upsetting for me to be placed in this category because I am widow with a child. No, widowers don't have an advantage over real single moms/dads. Its just as hard because some of our situation was unexpected and its life-changing in an instant. The only thing I have to say is most single parents are the most hard working people I know.
CandidCandora On Sunday, August 22 2010
IT WILL NEVER CEASE TO AMAZE ME....the double standards that make up the USofA-holes. Before we get SAT Prep options, we get Sex Ed. So from a young (UNMARRIED) age, we're encouraged to practice the activity that LEADS to pregnancies, yet get judged for having the unselfish courage to own up to our consequences (no offense to the MILLIONS aborting their babies)! Sex Ed may mention various contraceptive methods....but the only one that's 100% guaranteed against pregnancy is ABSTINENCE. Funny how quick folks are to point a finger at the likes of us....yet how hesitant they are to own up to their own sexual practices. Sounds to me like we're surrounded by psychological SADISTS who get a sick kick outta SCAPEGOATING the most vulnerable of society: Women with Children. God Bless America, alright!
MilitaryMom On Tuesday, August 24 2010
It's truly amazing how educated were suppose to be but instead we have statistics that demonstrate our ignorance. It is our responsibility as single parents to educate and demonstrate to others that being a single mom does not make us ignorant second no third class citizens since rapist and killers are second class. Yeah we fall beneath them. This is also a reason why we're falling and slipping behind other countries in education. Peaole wake up there is no guarantee that you will not be in a situation to raise your children as a single parent. I was married for 10 years and I am the sole provider of my 2 children. IU've raised them alone for 16 years. I've also been serving my country or longer than that, which makes it that much more difficult. The product (our children) of today are going to be the future leaders of tomorrow. Do you really want them raised by uneducated women? Exactly......Think!!!
Boudicca On Tuesday, August 24 2010
I'm 63 and a latch-key kid. My mom worked at a crumby job for decades and despite being educated was dumped on by her boses "because no woman is as good as a man in a job". I watched women stay in abusive marriages because of fear of the way working mothers get the shaft. Things haven't improved one iota since the fifties and sixties. Even many churches are very unsympathetic to the sruggles of working mothers (single or not) because they feel she should have stayed at home with the child/children and been a "dutiful" wife. Really ticks me off. I just finished advocating for a women beaten for 14 years who is disabled with two children (one autistic) and the court took the children, threw her out of the house, and laid claim against her income if she ever works again! The system is filled to the brim with hypocrits!
Natalie Reyes On Friday, September 03 2010
Single Parents work twice as hard and deserve the respect. Its not always our choice to be single parents and still we find the strenght to fight.
Yomomma On Tuesday, September 07 2010
I have a few comments, to Drea-I am there with you regarding the single parents who sit on their butts and do nothing but live off of the state. When I found myself a single mom with 3 children (ages-3 mon, 2 yrs, & 5 yrs), I tried to get some assistance for my kids because their dad didn't like to pay child support. The only thing that I could get was assistance with daycare, because I made $10 too much a month. I told them that that was stupid because I was being punished for working trying to make a living for my girls. I finally told them that I should just quit my job, sit on my butt, watching soap opera's everyday and then I would be able to get the assistance that I needed. I just wanted it long enough until I could get steady on my feet, not forever like some people I knew. It really was unfair that just because I worked, I couldn't quality for foodstamps - even though I didn't have money for groceries, cash assistance - even though I couldn't afford to buy them even a pair of socks, it really made me mad that I and others were being basically raped by our government. To Monroe - I agree with you that single fathers are praised for stepping up and taking care of the kids and single moms are put down for being single. It takes the same amount of effort for single fathers and mothers to raise that child. It is unfair how they treat single fathers over single mothers but that is our society. To Anonymous - I am sorry that your attoney/friend didn't advise you of the possibility of loosing custody of your son. I also had to worry about that when I had to send all 3 of my kids to stay with their dad when I had cancer and had to have surgery. I ended up taking them back earlier than planned because my youngest one was acting out at daycare and fighting with other kids, she was 2 1/2 at the time. Finally to CandidCandora - Don't know where you grew up, but here in the US when they did teach Sex Ed, we were not encouraged to practice the activity that LEADS to pregnancies, we were encouraged NOT to practice the activity that leads to pregnancies. So that makes me think you are not from the USA. I became a single when my x-husband decided it just wasn't convenienate for him to be married, he didn't want to have to spend so much time with his family. I did whatever I had to do to make sure that my kids had what they needed and would do anything to protect them from anyone that wanted to harm them. I am still that way today and they are 19 to 24 years old. It was hard sometimes and I wanted to give up, but I didn't want my kids any where but with me. I am so glad that I did that. My x-husband could not give my girls the love and attention that I did because he was not shown that we he was being raised. My girls liked being held, cuddled and kissed on and he didn't know how to do that so therefore, my youngest one acted out in daycare. She was no longer that loving little girl she was with me. Without being told, the daycare knew when she was back with me just because of the way she was acting, her sweet loving little self. My x-husband missed out on so much with them because they weren't top on his priorty list. I really felt sorry for him because of that, but I have always been grateful for not missing one thing in their life. My x-husband passed away in January 2010 from cancer and my kids were alittle upset about it but not much because they had not really spent alot of time with him in the last 10 years and he did not put forth much effort to change that either.
DXFISH On Friday, September 10 2010
It's odd how some people don't realize that a relationship is the most important decision you make in your life, and choosing your significant other is something that should be weighed in on with careful consideration.
A lot of people fail to see that you should choose someone not only based off love, but off of commitment, ability to support, and parental background. Those 3 items are far more important than love (or lust particularly), and that seems to have faded from mainstream society's mind. They think that is just some old fashioned way things were done in movies. HELLO PEOPLE, that is how successful and stable families have done things for centuries because that is the best way to ensure a family sticks together.
So, having sympathy for single parents, when one person knew the other person wasn't as committed, or as stable, or never even sat down for dinner with their family, doesn't strike much of a chord with me.
I'm not saying it's not fair, but it certainly is fair that people judge you based off your decisions. Having a broken family does reflect on your decisions, even if the person who left was a loser (after all, you chose the loser to begin with).
Just a thought.
Suzanne On Friday, September 10 2010
I'm a solo mom who sees plenty of bias against single moms and single-parented kids. BUT I don't believe in giving single moms special treatment (such as scholarships). This leads to pity and worsens, not improves, single-mom stereotypes. Scholarships and other assistance should be need-based, not marital-status-based. We create change by articulating loudly how we are Superwomen (and how wrong the fathers-rights statistics are). Speak up when your kids' principal uses the word "fatherless." Write your Congresspeople to change the old Bush legislation (taking $25 annually from every child receiving state-administered child support, to pay for "fathering classes"). Be the best employee in your office - and then the boss. And oppose special-interest scholarships like these.
Suzanne On Friday, September 10 2010
DXFISH: I could respond to your 9/10/10 comment by explaining how blaming women for "choosing losers" unfairly shifts the buck from deadbeat men who don't adequately support their partners and kids.
BUT that response would buy into the stereotypes that single moms (and their kids) are inferior and to be pitied, and that such kids' dads are all deadbeat losers. Why do you assume that single moms were treated poorly by their partners? (Many divorces are two-sided, many harmonious, and many improve the lives of all family members. That is: a divorce CHANGES a family, but it doesn't "break" it.) Why assume single moms were ever partnered? (1/3 of single moms are never married. A spattering are widows, and an increasing number are single moms by choice.)
Single parenthood is simply one formula of family, not an inferior or "broken" version of an ideal model. Sure, some single moms partner with losers. So, too, do some married moms, married dads, nonparents and heck, some vice-presidential candidates. The only statistical trend among single moms is that they tend to be poorer than married moms - and that's simply because there are fewer income-earners in the family.
Shennandoah Diaz On Tuesday, September 14 2010
I'm saddened and appalled by how volatile much of the rhetoric is and how so many people are wiling to assassinate the character of someone they don't know. Why is it that only married mothers have merit? I was a single mother for five years. I faced scorn, ridicule, and challenges. I didn't choose to be a single mother. I was building a family with a man who decided after our daughter was six months old that he didn't want a wife and family after all. Despite that, I got my degree with honors from a prestigious university on an academic scholarship while working 60 hours a week. The bulk of my research focused on poverty, particularly as it affects single mothers (my degree is in economics). The bias and hardships single mothers face are real, and they have detrimental affects on society as a whole. Welfare is not the problem. In fact it constitutes less than 1/4% of the total budget and is not by any means a flowing pot of gold. Welfare is a poor attempt at a solution--one that does not address the real problem. The real problem stems from the cyclical effects of poverty, the prevailing negative attitudes working against single mothers, and the tendency to boil issues down to black and white using stereotypes that do not reflect the real people dealing with real issues. It's unrealistic and unproductive to turn this into rich v. poor, lazy v. hardworking, race against race. I was white, hardworking, intelligent, from a middle class family--the very opposite of most people's image of the whoring single parent. Regardless of my race, background, or circumstance, if I'm working hard, living up to a solid value system, taking care of my child--don't I deserve to be valued as a whole person with dignity? Why do I need a man to have worth? Haven't we as a society moved forward over the last sixty years? Didn't we already have a civil rights movement? Or was justice and equality for all just a joke?
Legacy On Wednesday, November 03 2010
Imagine being a single mom with a special needs child and another child, working hard to raise a family and better yourself at the same time? Sometimes God sees fit to put upon some people more challenges than most...but in every situation, learn the most you can form everything so that some day you can give back to the world in a more unique way...
SA On Saturday, November 06 2010
I am a single (never married) mom. My son is 15 and I have raised him by myself, never had any child support because I could not locate his father - until it was too late. I just found out where he was for the past at least 12 years and that he died last year. He was not a US citizen, and I thought he had gone back to his country and his first son (he was divorced when I met him). Instead, he married someone else and stayed in the US and had a daughter and supported a stepson as well. I do feel there is a stigma attached to being a single, never-married mother. To add to that I have a physical disability as well (but I work- disability does not always mean someone is "on disability" as in government aid). Most of my son's friends' parents are married and I have always felt isolated.
JB On Saturday, December 11 2010
DXFISH not all people are willing to accept any type behavior in exchange for commitment, the ability to provide and parental background. My ex had all three of those qualities and on paper had all the makings of a good husband. In reality he was cold, emotionally distant and a cheater. So I left when our daughter was 4 years old and went my on way as a single mother with just a high school education and no real job skills at that time. However, we have managed. We don't live in luxury but are certainly middle class with my full-time income, (after obtaining some insurance licensing I do make a moderate salary), and the child support my ex pays amounts to about $9000 per year, but still helps. My point is regardless of how carefully you choose a partner, sometimes life happens, and no matter how a mother becomes single, the ones of us who work hard to try and better our lives and the lives of our children should be respected not judged. It is a difficult task for 2 full-time parents to raise even one child with a support system. Try being single with 2, deceased parents and very, very little support system. Seems impossible at time, yet, I've done so for the better part of 12 years and very well I might add. My oldest is now a junior in high school, 3.5 gpa, drum major in her school's band and will get at least a partial ride to a major state university. I make no apologies for being a single mom, my choice was either that or living in a lifeless, strained marriage with no passion or even true friendship and an unfaithful partner who might have eventually left anyway, or at the very least could have easily brought home an STD. No thanks. At least my children learn from me the values of hard work, independence and standing strong, rather than just accepting any kind of treatment from their spouse in order to have the cookie cutter lifestyle that is more socially acceptable.
Gary Reaves On Saturday, January 01 2011
All of the single moms I know are single moms because they had unprotected sex multiple partners, none of whom they were married to. So cry somewhere else. I have zero sympathy. They put themselves in this situation. Not America. Grow up and have some responsibility single moms.
Tracey Booth On Tuesday, January 18 2011
I went back to college and got my BA after my divorce with four kids in tow. I excelled in an industry that is extremely tough. My boss knew that I had children I raised WITHOUT child support. He also knew my drive to raise them in an house that resembled two incomes. So I worked hard going from making 35K to 89K in a year.
But I had to endure watching him lie and cheat on contracts etc. And keep my mouth shut or he'd fire me. I finally stood up to him, lost my job, and found a new one. Now a year later I find I work for a man that feels exactly as this article does about single mothers. Yet I can run circles around him. Hopefully someday I can get out of this rat race and work for myself.
Male bosses feel that he can berate me infront of co-workers, that he can basically mistreat me. I am terrified of him as he resembles my ex husband's mannerism. Yet, he knows I have to take it because I can't quit.
Stacy Williams On Wednesday, January 19 2011
I really feel for single moms who is single because of divorce or widow but it is so hard for me to feel for a single mom with two or more kids and half of them don't know who the father is. Remember, there are consequences to your actions. Don't expect a free handout everytime you turned around because you think you deserve one because you are single with children. Sometimes married with children have it just as hard, and they make it work without handouts. It shouldn't be no special treatments for you is my opinion.
Lana On Saturday, February 12 2011
children should not be born to 'inappropriate' parents, namely poor single-parent families
Kim On Monday, February 14 2011
This sight blows my mind. the men that put women down for being single parents are sickening individuals, u have no place to judge anyones life, god knows that, read the bible poeple. women of abuse that leave there husbands with their children to keep them safe and give them a life better than it was being mentally and physically hurt, im a single mom of three and with that have three fathers that dont pay child support and all in which have abused us, yes i have made bad choices to be with selfish ego piece of crap men but i chose to leave when they show their true colors. now im looked at bad by society cause i need help? well sorry poeple with judgemental lives. god speed. this will come to pass someday. i have struggled over and over just trying to keep a job when one gets sick and then another or all at the same time, no way to work if kids are sick months at a time. ive lost job after job. been homeless, no family support do to everyone is preoccupyed with their own lives and no time for notta, im sickened and scared for my life and want everything for my kids, and state assistance? well u poeple that think we shouldnt get help? u try living on just foodstamps and no income for three months and kids are in and out of hospitals and no way to do diddley squawt, i hope and pray god helps all of us single parents out there. and show these selfish sick poeple that dont give a crap how life and love and kindness should be,
Missash On Thursday, February 24 2011
I am thrilled that public opinion is turning against single motherhood. It costs taxpayers billions, not because of widowhood, but bad decisions. I am appalled that the idiots on this blog are still trying to promote this fragmented family structure after decades of evidence has concluded how devastating it is to children, communties, and women themselves.
ghekko On Wednesday, April 13 2011
Been there done that Bytesland - unfortunately my ex wife began to feel abandoned because she felt our son was getting more attention than she was. I assumed that since she was an adult she possessed the same maturity and responsibility that i did and would put the needs of our son before her own. I was wrong. She blindsided me, betrayed my trust and took our son 150 miles away with the help of an ill gotten protective order from an entirely different county because her dad just happened to be the chief of police there. The divorce was a railroading because I wasn't ready for any of this to happen. I couldn't even put up a fight financially. Now I pay child support to her for our son that I doubt he even gets any benefit from, while the divorce conditions prohibit me from even seeing my son. I haven't seen him for a year and it will probably be at least another year before I can afford to pay anyone to take action for my son. When American parents with kids act like kids it's their kids that suffer and pay. All the women that have decided to get on the sellout boat of having babies and ditching the men for the tax breaks and child support - know this - that shit IS going to catch up with you. What comes around goes around. Period. Stop pointing fingers and blaming others while enjoying the free ride and start thinking about your kids and what your actions are doing to the country you live in. Yeah, yeah I know what you're thinking you don't give a fuck about that do ya all you care about is right here right know and your fucking creature comforts. Your own personal lifestyles. You will pay for your crimes. Everyone does sooner or later. No one gets out "alive".